It’s been a week now since Mikes brother and I brought him home from the hospital. He was able to get the feeding tube, and we are getting nourishment into him as best as we can. I am so grateful for the experience last year as awful as it was, because I would not have any idea what I was doing this go round with the feeding tube without the wealth of experience from last year.
Mike has been enjoying popsicles, every kind of pop, broth, and other clear liquids that he can swallow. The liquids go into his stomach, and right back out the G- tube into a bag. He isn’t able to digest any solid food, so the liquids are just for his enjoyment. This is particularly cruel. Mike absolutely loves eating, and food. I have so enjoyed watching him eat over the last 3 years, and we spent the winter of 2015 laying in bed, and eating everything in sight. I gained 10 pounds, and enjoyed every minute of it.
The fact that he can’t eat anymore makes me so sad, I can barely stand it. This disease is different for everyone, and for Mike his stomach just doesn’t want food in it anymore.
We have settled into a routine of sorts. Focusing on short walks, catching up on our favorite shows on tv, and sitting outside on the patio. I am working some, and we are spending a lot of time with friends & family who love Mike, and love us.
When the sadness gets to be too much, Mike reminds me that he is still here, and not to look too far into the future. The hands that have brought me so much pleasure and joy, hold my hand all night as we sleep.
It is enough.